So much has been written about notions of “body
language.” Police investigators look for
signals from the body, which betray deceit on a person’s lips. Even the most sexually promiscuous person cannot
escape the reality that sexual intercourse speaks a “language of the body.” Sexual intercourse proclaims committed love
and openness to new life. Hence, “one
night stands” – even for so-called
“consenting adults” – involve lying with the body.
Marriage does not mean a license to use the sexual
functions willy nilly. Using the sexual
functions, in manners which cannot be open to
life, similarly involves lying with the body.
As has been said, marriage is a
sacrament – a “visible and efficacious sign.”
If our behavior reflects the body’s authentic language,
we are “in the truth.” Otherwise, we lie
and are false prophets. Yet, rather than
primarily accused and/or condemned, we are first called. In this section,
John Paul II’s reflection on the language of the body looks closely at the Song of Songs and Tobit:
- “the key for understanding marriage remains the reality of the sign with which marriage is constituted on the basis of man’s covenant with God in Christ and in the Church: it is constituted in the supernatural order of the sacred bond requiring grace. In this order, marriage is a visible and efficacious sign” (1/5/83).
- “breaking the covenant signifies not only an infraction of the ‘covenant’ connected with the authority of the Supreme Legislator, but unfaithfulness and betrayal….In the prophetic texts about the covenant based on the analogy of the spousal union of the couple, it is the body itself that ‘speaks’….In the prophetic texts, the human body speaks a ‘language’ of which it is not the author. Its author is man, as male or female, as bridegroom or bride: man with his perennial vocation to the communion of persons. Yet, man is in some sense unable to express this singular language of his personal existence and vocation without the body….the ‘language of the body’ according to the prophets is not only a language of ethos, not only a song of praise for faithfulness and purity as well as a condemnation of ‘adultery’ and ‘prostitution’ ….the body tells the truth through faithfulness and conjugal love, and, when it commits ‘adultery’ it tells a lie, it commits falsehood….We can say that the essential element for marriage as a sacrament is the ‘language of the body’ reread in the truth. It is precisely through this that the sacramental sign is constituted” (1/12/83).
- “A correct rereading ‘in the truth’ is an indispensable condition for proclaiming this truth or instituting the visible sign of marriage as a sacrament….On the basis of the ‘prophetism’ of the body, the ministers of the sacrament of Marriage perform an act of prophetic character….This perennial ‘language of the body’ bears within itself the whole richness and depth of the Mystery: first of creation, then of redemption….Into this truth of the sign, and consequently into the ethos of conjugal conduct, there is inserted, in a future-related perspective, procreative meaning of the body” (1/19/83).
- “If the human being male and female – in marriage (and indirectly in all spheres of mutual life together) gives to his behavior a meaning in conformity with the fundamental truth of the language of the body, then he too ‘is in the truth’. In the opposite case, he commits lies and falsifies the language of the body….one can in this regard also use the biblical distinction between ‘true’ and ‘false’ prophets….man and woman are explicitly called to bear witness – by correctly using the ‘language of the body’ – to spousal and procreative love, a testimony of ‘true prophets’” (1/26/83).
- “the ‘human heart’ is not so much ‘accused and condemned’ by Christ because of concupiscence…, but first of all ‘called’” (2/9/83).
- “Ah, you are beautiful, my beloved, ah, you are beautiful! Your eyes are doves behind your veil. Your hair is like a flock of goats streaming down the mountains of Gilead ....Your lips are like a scarlet strand; your mouth is lovely. Your cheek is like a half-pomegranate behind your veil….Your breasts are like twin fawns, the young of a gazelle that browse among the lilies….You are all-beautiful, my beloved, and there is no blemish in you….You have ravished my heart, my sister, my bride; you have ravished my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one bead of your necklace. How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride, how much more delightful is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your ointments than all spices! Your lips drip honey, my bride, sweetmeats and milk are under your tongue; And the fragrance of your garments is the fragrance of Lebanon. You are an enclosed garden, my sister, my bride, an enclosed garden, a fountain sealed.” (Song of Songs 4: 1,3,5,7,9-12) [In regard to the Song of Songs] “What was barely expressed in the second chapter of Genesis…is developed here in a full dialogue, or rather in a duet, in which the bridegroom’s words are interwoven with the bride’s, and they complete each other” (5/23/84).
- “The ‘language of the body’ reread in the truth goes hand in hand with the discovery of the inner inviolability of the person. At the same time, precisely this discovery expresses the authentic depth of the reciprocal belonging of the spouses, who are conscious of belonging to each other, of being destined for each other: ‘My beloved is mine and I am his (Song 2:16)’” (5/30/84).
- “The truth of love, which is proclaimed by the Song of Songs, cannot be separated from ‘the language of the body’….One has the impression that in encountering each other, reaching each other, experiencing closeness to each other, they ceaselessly continue to tend toward something….agape brings eros to fulfillment while purifying it” (6/6/84).
- "Raguel…said to the boy [i.e., Tobiah]: ‘Eat and drink and be merry tonight, for no man is more entitled to marry my daughter Sarah than you, brother….I will explain the situation to you very frankly. I have given her in marriage to seven men, …and all died on the very night they approached her. But now, son, eat and drink. I am sure the Lord will look after you both’….[On that wedding night,] Tobiah arose from bed and said to his wife, ‘My love, get up. Let us pray and beg our Lord to have mercy on us and to grant us deliverance.’ She got up, and they started to pray and beg that deliverance might be theirs. He began with these words: ‘Blessed are you, O God of our fathers; praised be your name forever and ever. Let the heavens and all your creation praise you forever. You made Adam and you gave him his wife Eve to be his help and support; and from these two the human race descended. You said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; let us make him a partner like himself.” Now, Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine not because of lust, but for a noble purpose. Call down your mercy on me and on her, and allow us to live together to a happy old age.’ They said together, "Amen, amen," and went to bed for the night….Raguel got up and summoned his servants. With him they went out to dig a grave, for he said, ‘I must do this, because if Tobiah should die, we would be subjected to ridicule and insult.’ When they had finished digging the grave, Raguel went back into the house and called his wife, saying, “Send one of the maids in to see whether Tobiah is alive or dead, so that if necessary we may bury him without anyone's knowing about it.’ She sent the maid, who lit a lamp, opened the bedroom door, went in, and found them sound asleep together. The maid went out and told the girl's parents that Tobiah was alive, and that there was nothing wrong. Then Raguel praised the God of heaven in these words: ‘Blessed are you, O God, with every holy and pure blessing! Let all your chosen ones praise you; let them bless you forever! Blessed are you, who have made me glad; what I feared did not happen. Rather you have dealt with us according to your great mercy. Blessed are you, for you were merciful toward two only children. Grant them, Master, mercy and deliverance, and bring their lives to fulfillment with happiness and mercy’ (Tobit 7:10 – 8:17)....[In the book of Tobit] We read…that Sarah…had already ‘been given in marriage to seven men’ (Tob 6:15), but all had died before uniting with her. This had happened through the work of the evil spirit, and young Tobias too had reasons to fear a similar death….If loves proves to be strong as death, this happens above all in the sense that Tobias (and Sarah with him) go without hesitating toward this test. But in this test of life-or-death, life has the victory, because, during the test of the first wedding night, love supported by prayer is revealed as stronger than death….Here the ‘language of the body’ seems to use the words of choices and acts that spring from a love that is victorious because it prays….The spouses of the Song of Songs mutually declare their human love with ardent words. The new spouses in Tobit ask God that they may know how to respond to love. Both aspects find their place in what constitutes the sacramental sign of marriage. Both share in the formation of this sign….through one as well as the other, the ‘language of the body,’ reread both in the subjective dimension of the truth of human hearts and in the objective dimension of the truth of living in communion, becomes the language of the liturgy” (6/27/84).
- “This seems to be the integral meaning of the sacramental sign of marriage. In this way, through the ‘language of the body,’ man and woman encounter the great ‘mysterium’ in order to transfer the light of this mystery, a light of truth and of beauty expressed in liturgical language, into the‘language of the body,’ that is, into the language of the praxis of love, of faithfulness, and of conjugal integrity, or into the ethos rooted in the ‘redemption of the body’ (see Rom 8: 23). On this road, conjugal life in some sense becomes liturgy” (7/4/84).
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